Enneagram Type 5 - The Observer
Explore all nine Enneagram types
Overview
Fives are mental types who focus on intellectual understanding and accumulating knowledge. They are often scholars or technical experts because of their keen perception and analytical ability. Privacy and personal autonomy are very important to them, and other people may be experienced as intrusive. The ability to detach from other people and from emotional pressure confers personal freedom, but may also create loneliness.
Some people of this type may be intellectually brilliant or knowledgeable, while feelings and relationships present an enormous challenge. For others, family and friends are very important, but they will still need lots of time alone to pursue their own interests and re-create themselves. Fives need to balance their tendency to withdraw or withhold from people by reaching out to others, even if this involves discomfort or conflict.
Strengths
Problems
Speaking style
Lower emotional habit
Higher emotion
Archetypal challenge
Psychological defenses
Somatic patterns
What type Fives tell us about themselves
- I have a strong need for privacy.
- I limit intrusion from a world that wants too much from me.
- I hoard time, space, energy, knowledge and myself.
- I detach from feelings and observe rather than participate.
- I am a minimalist.
Tips for Relating to Fives
- To create rapport: Approach them slowly and thoughtfully. Give them room to think things over.
- Try to avoid: Pressuring them for immediate contact or fast decisions
- Join them: Talking about ideas and valuing the inner life
- To handle conflict: Don’t make assumptions about what’s going on with them. Ask them for direct communication. Agree to disagree. Emphasize the importance of relationship. Watch out for control by withdrawal. Challenge them to be more warm and generous. Give them lots of information.
- To support their growth: Support Fives in getting into their bodies and accessing their instinctual energy. Make it safe for them to share themselves, especially their feelings. Remind them to let others know that they care, and that they will return to the relationship or project after a break. Help them deal with feelings of emptiness.
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